FOAMOLOGY

A dog's unconditional love is what you should aspire to emulate every day.

When did the word 'moist' become offensive?

Be careful not to practice too hard, just being yourself will put you in the line up.

Relying on others for guidance can be a blessing and a curse in disguise.

Once you get past the smell, you have to lick.

Another time around the block doesn't provide you with enough clout to change anything but your attitude.

Reminders of the past are emotion anchors, until the line breaks and you drift away.

Sharing your past is a good thing only when you don't include the salacious parts.

If you can learn from other cultures, you are human. If you resist, you are Republican.

Be ready for anything, be flexible, be strong, be you.

Overheard at a busy Portland brewery "Anything can be used as a dildo if you're brave enough..."

Don't deny the flow.

The past will haunt you if you let it.

Brainstorming session lesson, be careful what you ask for. Best lesbian bar name: "Snap-On Tools".

Take chances every day, don't waste it.

Doing the right thing is not cowardly, it's heroic.

When in Portland, it's normal to ask hipster lumberjacks "Are you racist, or just like cutting down trees?"

Soft and rounded is good when it applies to food/drink, not your relationship.

Don't be alarmed when your plans fail, adapt and overcome, become the stronger you.

Remember to thank your mom, for without her, you wouldn't​ be here.

Don't let the politics of identity cause you grief, be yourself always and without shame.

Believing in second chances is like playing a game of blind Russian Roulette.

Beer can bring together the most amazing people.

Rejoice when you're ready for tomorrow!

The start of the redneck experience is the end of civilization.

Having options is a two edged sword.

Don't think you can't overcome the inevitable, it's merely an illusion of fear.

Subtlety in life can bring it's own rewards.

An impatient attitude begets regrets.

When in a new setting, behave like your mom is watching.

The fear of "No" can paralyze and destroy, don't be a slave to it.

Sharing left over pizza is a human right.

Even the best intentions can have the sneakiest of motivations.

Having a friendly conversation with the neighborhood drunk can be enlightening, sometimes.

Bring all the negativity together and give it a Viking funeral.

Embrace growing older, as with age, comes wisdom.

Friends can be challenging sometimes, remember to give them and yourself time.

Dreams do come true, but only if you let them.

Is working at a bowling alley the moral equivalent to living in a trailer park?

Don't forget to count your blessings, even when you're emotionally bankrupt.

Celebrate unions in any way, shape, or form they take.

A desire can lead to pain or pleasure, the choice is all yours.

You haven't lived until you've experienced bowling league drama.

Enjoy the experience, not the expectations.

Dream the big dream, live it every day.

Don't expect consistency when none exists.

Deeper isn't always better, when speaking about beer that is.

When the "Girls of Walmart" are walking down the street, is it a bad thing to ask "Can I get a discount?"

Even bad tasting beer can be good to the right person.

Even when things don't mesh, be ready for the strangest of surprises.

Even book nerds can be cool when beers are consumed in conjunction.

Even a risky proposition can be worth the rewards, don't fear them, act with discernment.

"Wait, my mouth is full and hot..." but that's not what anyone said but the drunk next to me...

Support sometimes takes a quick hit up side the head. Be ready!

Citizenship should not be a test, it should be based on how much you pay in taxes.

Better to bigly in the front than bigly in the back.

Expand your present and embrace the opportunity, whatever it is.

Even embarrassing moments from your past can enlighten our current situation.

Feeling lonely on Valentine's Day is your own fault, friends don't require the maintenance, and all you have to do is ask.

"Does it really have to be a ten?" overheard at a bar regarding your perspective lawyer.

Even if you are a fan for a day because you hate Brady, at least learn the names of the opposition players.

Even if the situation calls for decorum, push the envelope every chance you get.

"Hao da" is the only measurement that matters.

Knowing your food boundaries is a two edged sword. Value your limits while pushing your boundaries.

Saying the President acts like a 12 yr. old, wrongs 12 yr. olds.

"I'm not old, I'm 1/2 way there..." as quoted on my birthday.

Heard at a bar on Inauguration day "You're out of your element Donny..." and we all laughed and not as reference to the movie.

Growing up just means you know better.

Don't let bad weather prevent good intentions.

When the future is unknown, take time to let your dreams bubble back up or risk living in regret.

Self awareness is knowing when it's cold enough outside to need another whisky or beer to keep warm.

Start the year unafraid of the challenges you face, for they make you a stronger person.

The only way to learn about your culture is to embrace another.

Doing the one thing that makes your friend squirm is like juggling knives, one slip and you may need to visit an emergency room.

"It wasn't about the sex...said no woman ever."

Perhaps giving more and wanting less in life can provide the drive to find happiness.

How did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank his coffee before it was cool....

When relatives you never knew about suddenly friend request you...don't be shy, embrace the unknown as it may bare the largest fruit.

Forward thinking in life prevents reverse engineering of the present.

Having less faith in the system means you must exhibit more faith in each other.

The best presents are the ones you make yourself, unless it requires a bunch of lube and a lenghty explanation.

Even an inch worm hurts at 100 MPH.

Believing anything a politician says is like believing that unicorn poop tastes like ice cream (Squatty Potty).

Politics make for fun conversation when everyone believes the same.

Don't shy away from the past, embrace that part which retains those memories or they will be lost.

4 post Pat pegged; and all broke in the end.

Regardless of your ego, stature, wealth, or position in life, being humble and demonstrating respect of others grants the greatest rewards.

Begining every day with more doubts than expectations breeds discontentment towards free thought.

"Not all super powers are super..." as discovered at Rose City Comic Con today.

Even the lack of direction can't stifle the spirit's expression and desire for freedom.

Aren't we all still waiting on our "trickle down" checks...said no Republican ever.

Spending time with friends provides much needed decompression. Value it, cherish it, practice it.

Family drama goes in cycles, and often you end up where you sarted.

"Sup Brah?" is the bane of today's urban culture.

Have faith in the younger generation for they shall repeat the past and know better.

Even 4th graders know right from wrong when it comes to pizza.

When your relationship passes the 20 year mark, compromise will be your best friend.

When the "Bigger Blacker ____" is in play, embrace it, don't let it ruin your evening.

Don't diss the doo, even the best hair days can't withstand a bad hat.

Celebrating birthdays isn't always bad, especially when you get drunk by noon.

Reconnecting with rarely seen family can lead to new insights you can embrace.

Anticipation makes the heart long for the next stage of life to catch up to your dreams.

Allowing others to affect your stance isn't always bad thing, but don't let desire override reason.

Successful use of the "Stink-Eye" can be apprapro to the subtly of a challenging discourse on Pokémon Go.

"Brewing is just brewing...I'm not impressed unless you're using unicorn blood or something!" Heard in Bend OR recently.

Just be ready for the avalanche of emotions when the snowstorm of life catches up with you.

If you never try something new, you can't truly appreciate life.

The point to exploring new paths in life is to get lost and find your inner self.

Don't shame someone's fetish just because you have never tried it yourself.

The road less traveled is just a road.

Remember to smile even with the sushi face on.

Even with the short end of the stick, you can achieve great heights with a little effort.

Butter on some things is good, except when the off-flavor shows up in your beer.

Even if you don't know, you really are shooting star....or so the song goes.

Even the greatest players in the world (Messi) is human and can be overconfident.

Puppies are the aphrodisiac for mankind.

Don't wait for the other shoe to drop when the first one hits you up side the head.

Follow the easy path only when there are no other options.

Having too many choices can bring you distress, just go with the flow wherever it takes you.

Often the best laid plans experience hiccups. Being flexible is a virtue not to be confused with compromise.

A brave man once asked, "Do Subarus come with a sushi sented car freshner"?

Babies can be super cute, until they are not.

Family is something you make. Relatives are what you have to deal with.

Pain is momentary, the satisfaction of achieving your goals is forever!

Our differences make us human, hate makes us animals.

Don't be afraid of the unknown, "hello" usually suffices.

Practice using your imagination every day or risk being a boring cubical dweller.

Your salary level doesn't determine how good of a friend or listener you are.

Live in the present, as someday you will miss today.

Telling a Veteran "Thank you for your service." is like telling a priest, "Thank you for believing in God."

Sometimes meticulous planning can't stand up to dumb luck.

Sometimes clowdy, rainy weather can bring some good to you, but only if you let it.

Don't throw away opportunities because you are stubborn, life is compromise.

Be aware that drunks at a bar are not ever worth listening too even if they insist.

His eyes aren't the window to his soul, the tie he wears is.

Sometimes pointing out the obvious doesn't impart understanding to the introverts in your life.

The outlook you want is possible, be dedicated and don't ever give up!

You need to stop stressing out over other people's perceptions and believe in yourself.

To live, let your instincts have more influence on you than fear.

Don't let he deep voice fool you, said no Texan evar!

Just because the flowers smell good, doesn't mean they aren't invasive weeds in nature.

Having more choices doesn't mean you are better off, it only means less compromise.

Risk taking with work is like setting up a long line of dominoes, allowing outside forces to play out can be painful until the last one falls.

Never trust a drunk friend to show you the right way out of the club.

The truth can always be found in the bottom of the glass, you just might not like what it says.

You can only live a "normal" life through the lense of an early 90's Democrat.

Remember to celebrate the past's victories over oppression, especially when it's regarding prohibition! #NationalBeerDay

Birthdays are like funerals as you get older, you never want to attend your own.

Watching requires observation, interpretation, and measurement against beliefs. Don't just look, watch the world around you every day.

Sand is to beaches, like immigrant workers are to any Trump hotel.

The only fool is the one that believes they are smarter than you.

Don't let long-distance input ruin a good thing in the here and now.

It's all about the journey, not the destination...said no one ever on an overseas flight!

Listen to kids when in doubt, they have no frame or filters.

Don't believe the hype, Superman will resurrect just like #ZombiJesus did.

The easiest thing to forget are sometimes the most important.

"I don't know?" is not an answer anyone wants to hear when they are picking out a hairstyle with their barber.

Living means trying new things, even when you know the outcome ahead of time.

If cookies can't heal the scars, perhaps there's deeper wounds that require pizza to soothe the pain?

When considering the electability of candidates, remember that lipstick on a pig is still a pig.

Age is just a number, especially if you're a dog.

The past may repeat itself, but only if you let it.

When the Zombiepocolypse happens, those of us that know how to use a map and compass shall inherit the Earth. Don't laugh.

If practicing yoga brainwashes you into speaking Hindu (Pat Robertson), I wonder what practicing common sense brainwashes you into?

Practice your craft as often as you can, failures are really just "little victories" in disguise.

The best times are often the one's shared with friends and foes.

Along the most traveled paths are way post to help you figure out the easy way out.

Have hope in humanity, we're all trying to make a difference in our own ways.

Remember to smile at least once day, or everyone will think you are perma-pissed at them.

Don't forget to give love a chance.

Don't shy away from your dreams and ambitions. Share them with you friends for greater results.

Embrace the opportunity to explore life every chance you get, otherwise you risk living in regret.

Age brings wisdom only when honesty and integrity share the stage.

Believe only in the positive, negativity breeds contempt and contempt leads to fear.

Don't be satisfied with just ok, push the edge of comfort to really live life.

Students should remember not to major in minor things.

When someone says "I've been dressed since..." don't believe a word of it.

A wise woman once said: "If I only had a mustache, life would have been so different..."

Don't ignore the past, for it will undoubtedly repeat itself over and over when ignored.

Live your life as an exclamation, not an explanation.

When you daydream, don't forget your ruby red slippers.

"Does the preposition occur before the proposition ?"

A true measure of character is when one is humble, can one also be honest?

"It's not the size of the chili fries.." said no drunk catholic Irishman ever...

Even the best laid plans may fail, be willing to accept this as new opportunity to plow new paths in life.

If you are not able to believe your own hype, then you need to broaden your horizons.

Remember that you cannot change the past, only be in the moment.

Never overestimate your power to change others. Never underestimate your power to change yourself.

Know the past is the past only when you repeat it.

When using the word "banal" be careful not to apply it liberally around drunk people.

Remember that overnight success usually takes about fifteen years.

No one believes in the boogieman but those with something to feel guilty about.

Be thankful for the friends and family around you, they tend to forgive your faults before you will.

Never cut what can be untied.

A wise woman using a cork screw once said: "Why won't this open? Oh, wait, it's a twist top..."

Remember that winners do what losers don’t want to do.

A wise arborist once said "Don’t be afraid to go out on a limb. That’s where the fruit is."

Remember that everyone sees the glitter, no one sees the pressure (i.e. diamonds and your life).

Beware the rabbit hole of indecisiveness, for it is lined with detours and dead ends.

Don't ever let the smaller parts of life ruin the bigger whole.

Beware the spooky drunk, for they know no fear.

Remember to accentuate the best in life while giving the rest its due.

Why is this so foamy in my mouth?

Life's little surprises can support difficult decisions, don't ignore them.

It's a bad thing when even your own party supporters say "OMG why so many male versions of Michele Bachmann running this time?"

It's not about the speed, but the quality and treatment of the fries that makes the difference.

Don't take the funny things in life without enjoying the icecream after.

More beer equals less stupid.

The level of confusion demonstrated disproportionately reveals the level of incompetence

There is always a story at the bottom of the glass.

Believe that your influence isn't just visible, but reaches into the collective unconscious.

When life presents the opportunity, take it, don't waffle.

Take chances with exploring new avenues in creating and sharing your life.

Don't disregard the obvious path forward, it can often be the best choice.

Subtleties of joy lie within the abstraction of shared memories.

If drag is an expression of self, transition should be celebrated as the truest form thereof.

Take the time with friends to share the good with the bad. Resolution will organically occur.

Celebration of new directions in life provide for exceptional imbibing.

I denounce you "Empty pitcher syndrome!" you hold no power over me.

Gutes Bier ist gesund, erspriesslich und lecker. Everything in life should be!

Knowing when to use "Less talk, more drink!" comes in handy when time is of the essence.

19 years together may seem like a long time, but it goes by in the blink of an eye.

A long winter and short spring will not mean a slow harvest, reap the best and store the rest!

Share the quiet moments in life, they often bring surprisingly excellent outcomes.

Allow for the stranger opportunities in life to open your frame of reference.

Beware friendly Germans that bring Underberg shots to your BBQ.

Even the hard choices in life have a silver lining, be open to looking in odd places for them.

Traveling to new places can be more rewarding than you will never know if you never go...

Even the slightest reverberation of past relationships can create waves of regret.

Let the good time's roll! Then roll with them...

Let the preconceived notions that shape one's negativity stay in the realm of possibilities, don't give them weight

Don't hide from your past, it's in the past and cannot hurt you (much).

The greatest friendships last through the good, the bad, gaps in time, and lifes hardest challenges.

Believe in the past, it can bring the present into perspective without much effort.

History shall judge the actions of you as inclusive and not exclusive. Strive to be on the right side of the truth #LoveWins ....

Enjoy the quiet moments as life provides them, for the noise of society will disrupt them often and without abandon.

When you discover that 1/2 of the year has passed and you have yet to start on your New Years resolution, that's indicative of someone who procrastinates habitually.

When there is only a "best of the worse" option, just close your eyes and wish for the best...

Take a stance and believe you can make the difference in the lives of the young.

Support the ideas and dreams of the younger generation, you may find an Einstein in the rough waiting to .blossom

Nature takes care of the hard parts, your job is to open yourself up to accepting the outcomes.

Don't be afraid to forgive peoples faults even when they don't deserve it.

Strengthen your resolve by accepting the faults of others.

Eating Chinese food is like having sex with your ex. Tastes great going down, but you hate yourself the next morning.

Be careful when you speak negatively about coworkers at a bar, you never know who may be listening.

Just because the glass is empty, doesn't mean that you are.

Can a long conversation with friends alter your outlook on life? Try it and find out.

Be welcoming to the ideas of friends and acquaintances as they see you as you are.

When life gives you lemons, make a vodka tonic with a twist of lemon and celebrate the challenge.

The memories of the past are in the past, let them guide, but not run your present life.

Beware of friendly cats, they have alterior motives to take advantage of you.

Be willing to explore the world around you or risk missing the best moments of life.

Subtle hints from friends should not be ignored, less you risk embarrassing yourself.

Embrace your true self, it's the only one you got!

Mutual weirdness is just another word for love.

Practice the art of patience when it is hardest to do to learn more about yourself.

Bring the best intentions to the parts of life you share with others.

As in Deutschland, share your table with those you do not know.

Challenge yourself to share kindness with a stranger at least once a day.

Believe in the power of curiosity and life will provide the venue to explore it daily.

The fine art of being 'Redneck' is culture based, not skill.

Find comfort in exploring new places with friends, you can share the disappointment and cherrish the gems.

Plan ahead or play the game of life with one arm tied behind your back.

Support your friends in times of need, even the smallest gestures can make the biggest impact.

Tax day is fun day, said no one ever.

OMG, this relationship is almost old enought to drink...

Believe that you are special in every way. Support those with dreams, they make reality liveable.

One must learn to go slow before you can go fast .

The noise you hear is only what you let in. Wear ear plugs when negative static encroaches .

Easter (Zombie Jesus) day is best celebrated with friends, beer, and barking sea lions on the coast.

Take a moment to imagine your situation in reverse. You might be surprised.

Even when life's little challenges seem too much, embrace the hard and share the experience with friends.

Explore the possibility that you may not always be on the right track in life, as the universe always ebbs and flows.

Bring your 'A' game when everything seems harder than it should, beacuse your 'B' game will let you down every time.

"I need my moisturizer, pass the ranch" ...said once at a bar in Vantucky.

Partaking in introspective reflection can lead to disassembly of the ego.

Don't shy away from discourse on personally challenging topics, words don't kill people, bullets do.

My boss once said "A fool with a tool, is still a fool." Take this to heart.

(Chem)Trails of past decisions lead to the opportunity to reflect on patterns within outcomes .

The future isn't that far off, don't blame tomorrow's problems on today's laziness .

You can't go back, stop imagining the regrets or forevermore be discontent.

Supplement happiness with curiosity when boredom encroaches.

Where yesterday becomes tomorrow...visit the international date line.

Help, I'm drowning in hipsterisms.

Settling for less means you forgive your imperfections.

Favorite quote about conservatism: "Boldly going towards a past that never existed."

Friendly discourse with a full pint provides for gregarious prestidigitation.

Find the inspiration for life in the small things you encounter. They will provide the biggest return.

Belief in the possibilities that can be, can bring you to know truth in life.

The apex of your desires will occur when you least expect it to.

Celebrate and share your differences as your uniqueness is the spice of life.

Support will manifest when it's needed. Be aware when the universe provides this chance.

Welcome the future with open arms and a weary heart.

Comfort zones are most often expanded through discomfort.

The journey to self discovery begins with introspective dialogue between the ego and id.

Don't let the lack of completion of promises impact your outlook in life.

Challenge yourself to talk about stuff you know nothing about at least once a week.

Redarding matters of the heart, there are no wrong choices, just bad choices.

Remember the beginning and end of the day look the same when you are sideways to the horizon.

Past habits will haunt your present if you don't actively seek change or growth every day.

Three words, Blazer Beer Goggles.

Never stop believing in your ability to make a difference in the world.

Discovering your lack of tolerance towards incompetence will only provide the opportunity for denial.

When the way forward is looking bleak, just remember that you should look right and left as the residue of the past always sticks around.

Blisters on the feet during vacation are both a blessing and a curse. They force you to slow down and provide the chance to observe one's surroundings, and they force you be late and bitch the whole time you are walking to catch the Metro.

Celebrate the things which you hold dearest to your heart every chance you can. Even when the feelings are not.

Starting the new year in Barcelona can only lead to a nasty hangover. Be weary of bartenders that pour stiff drinks.

Little children only see through a creative lense, even when the world around them is full of doubt and sorrow. Find that inner child when life challenges you.

Enjoy new experiences and learn from them. Trust your instincts to provide for these when the opportunity presents itself.

Having a Private Investigator look for you 1/2 way across the US is much less worse than having some obsessed woman with a ghost child obsessing over you.

Beware the puffy tailed cat. Or suffer the blue-man-group hand.

Be weary of making plans too far in advance, the universe has a way of throwing you curve balls even with a leftie at bat.

Don't count on the past to save you from the present.

Spring forth ye' cold and dreary winter gloom and wither away from the warmth of kinship and fellowship.

As you get older, the opportunity for experiences to matter more than schooling will become clear.

Celebrating your friends and being in the present is one of life's rewards, cherish them when they occur.

To discover the unknown past through impartial discourse over imbibing lends to surprising outcomes.

Opportunities to find new ways in life are important and should not be passed up or you risk life passing you by like a semi on the freeway, you'll get pushed around in the wake of regret.

Sometimes looking at problems from the side view and not the from the top down allows you to find extra meanings and intuition to flourish.

During moments of clarity, you should always look in your rear view mirror.

Seeking resolution for ones future challenges in the here and now brings you closer to happiness.

Strategies to improve your resilience should include asking strangers to suggest "what to eat" at dinner.

Seeking answers from others when you are not aware of your own problems can be hard on friendships and trust.

Shiny bubbles aren't all what they appear to be. You have been warned.

The greatest challenges we face in life are the one's our subconscious invents for us. Be true to yourself and the universe will look after you.

Subjecting oneself to doubt brings nothing but remorse. Look inside for the greater good you share with others and know you are loved.

Finding the right angles can be challenging, try shifting your point of view for alternative visions.

Cooperative licences to participate in disjunctive discord is implied when alcohol is applied during one's investment of conversation.

Impartiality and indifference are to be discovered when the tongue is loosened by beer or distress of the heart.

Working towards the unknown isn't bad, but can be dangerous.

Scattered moments of clarity escape during political discourse when fuzzy logic follows beer drinking.

The path to the future can be paved with familiarity or the complexities of the present. The choice is yours.

Looking for the bottom can only make you full...

Movements towards possibilities or away from stagnation allow for chance to happen. Don't fret when this occurs...the universe knows what to do.

Periods of growth will present themselves to those open to change. Patterns present these opportunities, one must be aware of them in a sub-conscious way...or you will miss them.

Echos of past decisions bring about opportunities to reflect and grow beyond your own self image.

The greatest challenges you face are only perceptions of fear. Overcome those fears and the universe will show you the path to happiness.

The missing parts of your life shall be filled in through pre-determined means. Gathering trust in the universe to allow this is essential to finding your center.

Movements in life are either expansive or stagnant according to the motives you project to others.

As time passes (or in this case, the consumption of beer), you find waves (or foam rings), marking the moments that provide both the busy and introspective moments of life.

Two notions that are separate (as represented by the 2 larger voids), are actually linked through a multitude of minute ideas and concepts, inextricably bound by life.

Daydreaming of mountain tops at dusk leads to dangerous unintended revelations about ones life.

Find that inner balance, the 'Yin & Yang' of anticipation and need bring about frustration when the glass is empty.

When you are looking for direction in life, look no further than the road in front of you.

...this looks like I'm gonna need to find a dog to go play with to work off the calories i just drank..

The day's ahead are going to prove to be difficult and insurmountable if you don't take a small break before you start counting the bubbles.

Empty Picture Syndrome can be difficult to deal with when one is drinking alone.

Discovering one of the many great mysteries in life is just a pint away.

When you look in the mirror, remember that reflections of yourself and how you feel may be closer than they appear.

Empty pitchers are sad..especially at the Lucky Lab in Portland Oregon

When life gives you beer-goggles, find a bigger krug!

The last few drops are always the sweetest, or warmest depending on how slow you sip.

What happens when you enjoy your kegerator too much at home? Widmer Brothers empty glass syndrome.